You’re on my porch
You’ve forgotten who I am
(or was)

It was my mistake
to let you on my porch
I forgot who you are

I forget who you were

I close my eyes
breathe through my nose
concentrate

to remember

Your eye crinkle when you laugh —
it’s my favorite
it was my favorite

You’re telling me about a new woman now
it seems she might talk to you again
or maybe not and
you don’t know whether to hope or despair for your upcoming conversation
You worry aloud that it could be the worst conversation of your life.

Your eyes don’t crinkle when I say

What.
The.
Actual.
Fuck.

Your head is in your hands when I leave you on
my porch
to take
our children
to the pool